וְעַל דָּא אִתְעַרְנָא דִּכְתִיב, (בראשית כ״ח:י״א) וַיִּפְגַּע בַּמָּקוֹם וַיָּלֶן שָׁם, דְּנָטִיל רְשׁוּ בְּקַדְמִיתָא. מִכָּאן אוֹלִיפְנָא דְּמָאן דְּמִתְחַבֵּר בְּאִנְתְּתֵיהּ בָּעֵי לְמִפְגַע לָהּ וּלְבַסְמָא לָהּ בְּמִלִּין, וְאִי לָאו לָא (קמח ב) יָבִית לְגַבָּהּ. בְּגִין דִּיהֵא רְעוּתָא דִלְהוֹן כְּחֲדָא בִּדְלָא אֲנִיסוּ. We make a similar reflection on the verse, ‘And he prayed in the place and tarried there.’ (Gen. 28, 11), viz. that Jacob sought permission first. From this we learn that a man who desires his wife’s society must first entreat and coax her; and if he cannot persuade her, he must not stay with her, for their companionship must be loving and unconstrained.

וַיָּלֶן שָׁם כִּי בָא הַשֶּׁמֶשׁ, לְאַחֲזָאָה דְּאֲסִיר לֵיהּ לְבַר נָשׁ לְשַׁמְשָׁא עַרְסֵיהּ בִּימָמָא. וַיִּקַּח מֵאַבְנֵי הַמָּקוֹם וַיָּשֶׂם מֵרַאֲשׁוֹתָיו, הָכָא אוֹלִיפְנָא דַּאֲפִילוּ יְהוֹן לְמַלְכָּא עַרְסֵי דְדַהֲבָא וּלְבוּשֵׁי יְקָר לְמֵיבַת בְּהוּ וּמַטְרוֹנִיתָא תַּתְקֵין לֵיהּ עַרְסָא מִתְתַּקַּן בְּאַבְנִין, יִשְׁבּוֹק דִּילֵיהּ וְיָבֵית בַּמֶּה דְּאִיהִי תַּתְקִין דִּכְתִיב וַיִּשְׁכַּב בַּמָּקוֹם הַהוּא. It says further of Jacob that ‘he tarried there because the sun had set’, which shows that sexual intercourse is forbidden during the day. Further it says that ‘he took of the stones of the place and put it under his head’. From this we learn that even a king who has a bed of gold with precious coverings, if his wife prepares for him a bed of stones, must leave his own bed and sleep on the one which she prepares, as it is written, ‘and he lay down in that place’.

תָּא חֲזֵי, מַה כְּתִיב הָכָא וַיֹּאמֶר הָאָדָם זֹאת הַפַּעַם וְגו'. הָא בְּסִימוּ דְּמִלִּין לְאַמְשְׁכָא עִמָּהּ חֲבִיבוּתָא, וּלְאַמְשָׁכָא לָהּ (עמה) לִרְעוּתֵיהּ לְאַתְעָרָא עִמָּהּ רְחִימוּתָא. חָמֵי כַּמָּה בְּסִימִין אִנּוּן מִלִּין, כַּמָּה מִלֵּי דִרְחִימוּתָא אִנּוּן, עֶצֶם מֵעֲצָמַי וּבָשָׂר מִבְּשָׂרִי, בְּגִין לְאַחֲזָאָה לָהּ דְּאִנּוּן חַד וְלָא אִית פִּירוּדָא בֵּינַיְיהוּ בְּכֹלָּא. Observe that it says here AND THE MAN SAID, THIS TIME, ETC., to show that he spoke to her lovingly so as to draw her to him and to win her affections. See how tender and coaxing is his language-‘bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh’-to prove to her that they were one and inseparable.

הַשְׁתָּא שָׁרֵי לְשַׁבָּחָא לָהּ. לְזֹאת יִקָּרֵא אִשָּׁה דָּא הִיא דְּלָא יִשְׁתַּכַּח כַּוָּותָהּ. דָּא הִיא יְקָרָא דְּבֵיתָא כֻּלְּהוֹן נָשִׁין גַּבָּהּ כְּקוֹפָא בִּפְנֵי בְּנִי נָשָׁא. אֲבָל לְזֹאת יִקָּרֵא אִשָּׁה שְׁלִימוּ דְּכֹלָּא לְזֹאת וְלָא לְאַחֲרָא. כֹּלָּא הוּא מָלֵי רְחִימוּתָא כְּמָא דְאַתְּ אָמֵר, (משלי ל״א:כ״ט) רַבּוֹת בָּנוֹת עָשׂוּ חָיִל וְאַתְּ עָלִית עַל כֻּלָּנָה: Then he began to sing her praises: THIS SHALL BE CALLED WOMAN, this is the peerless and incomparable one; this is the pride of the house, who surpasses all other women as a human being surpasses an ape. This one is perfect in all points, and alone merits the title of woman. Every word is inspired by love, like the verse ‘Many daughters have done valiantly, but thou excellest them all’ (Prov. 31, 29).

עַל כֵּן יַעֲזָב אִישׁ אֶת אָבִיו וְאֶת אִמּוֹ וְדָבַק בְּאִשְׁתּוֹ וְהָיוּ לְבָשָׂר אֶחָד, כֹּלָּא לְאַמְשָׁכָא לָהּ בִּרְחִימוּ וּלְאִתְדַּבְּקָא בַּהֲדָהּ, כֵּיוָן דְּאִתְעַר לְגַבָּהּ כָּל מִלִּין אִלֵּין, מַה כְּתִיב וְהַנָּחָשׁ הָיָה עָרוּם וְגו'. הָא אִתְעַר יֵצֶר הָרָע לְאַחֲדָא בָּהּ בְּגִין לְקָשְׁרָא לָהּ בְּתִיאוּבְתָּא דְגוּפָא וּלְאַתְעָרָא לְגַבָּהּ מִלִּין אָחֳרָנִין דְּיֵצֶר הָרָע אִתְעַנַּג בְּהוּ. THEREFORE A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND HIS MOTHER AND CLEAVE TO HIS WIFE, AND THEY SHALL BE ONE FLESH: all this, too, was to win her affection and to draw her closer. AND THE SERPENT WAS SUBTLE. After the man had addressed all these words to the woman, the evil inclination awoke, prompting him to seek to unite with her in carnal desire, and to entice her to things in which the evil inclination takes delight,

עַד לְבָתַר מַה כְּתִיב וַתֵרֶא הָאִשָּׁה כִּי טוֹב הָעֵץ לְמַאֲכָל וְכִי תַאֲוָה הוּא לָעֵינַיִם וַתִּקַּח מִפִּרְיוֹ וַתֹּאכַל, קְבֵילַת לֵיהּ בִּרְעוּתָא וַתִּתֵּן גַּם לְאִישָׁהּ עִמָּהּ (ויאכל) הָא כְּדֵין הִיא אִתְעֲרָא לְגַבֵּיהּ בְּתִיאוּבְתָּא (נ"א בתאובתא) לְאַתְעָרָא (נ"א למיהב) לֵיהּ רְעוּתָא וּרְחִימוּ, דָּא מִלָּה לְאַחֲזָאָה עוֹבָדָא לִבְנֵי נָשָׁא כְּגַוְונָא דִלְעֵילָא. until at last THE WOMAN SAW THAT THE TREE WAS GOOD FOR FOOD, AND THAT IT WAS A DELIGHT FOR THE EYES AND SHE TOOK OF THE FRUIT THEREOF AND ATE-giving ready admission to the evil inclination-AND GAVE ALSO UNTO HER HUSBAND WITH HER: it was she now who sought to awaken desire in him, so as to win his love and affection. This account shows the proceedings of human beings after the model of those above.

אָמַר רַבִּי אֶלְעָזָר אִי הָכִי בְּמַאי נוֹקִים לֵיהּ לְעֵילָא יֵצֶר הָרָע דְּאָחִיד בָּהּ בְּנוּקְבָא, אָמַר לֵיהּ, הָא אִתְעֲרָא אִלֵּין לְעֵילָא וְאִלֵּין לְתַתָּא יֵצֶר טוֹב וְיֵצֶר רָע. יֵצֶר טוֹב מִיָּמִינָא וְיֵצֶר רָע מִשְׂמָאלָא, וּשְׂמָאלָא לְעֵילָא אָחִיד בְּנוּקְבָא לְקַשְׁרָא לָהּ כְּחֲדָא (נ"א לאתקשרא ביה) בְּגוּפָא כְּמָא דְאַתְּ אָמֵר, (שיר השירים ב׳:ו׳) שְׂמֹאלוֹ תַּחַת לְרֹאשִׁי וְגו', וְעַל דָּא מִלִּין אִתְפַּרְשָׁן לְעֵילָא וְתַתָּא עַד הָכָא, מִכָּאן וּלְהָלְאָה מִלִּין בְּזוּטְרָא (נ"א בזוטא) דְּזִיפְתָא לִזְעִירֵיהּ דְּטִינְקִין לְפָרְשָׁא מִלָּה, וְהָא אִתְעָרוּ בֵּיהּ חַבְרַיָּיא. Said R. Eleazar, ‘If so, what are we to make of the evil inclination seizing the female above?’ He said: ‘It has already been observed that one set (Left and Right) is above and one set below, viz. the good inclination and the evil inclination; the good inclination on the right and the evil inclination on the left. The Left above seizes the female to join with her in the body, as it is written, “his left hand under my head, etc.” (S. S. 2, 6). In this way the passage can he interpreted as applying both above and below. The rest of the points are not at all recondite, and a child almost could elucidate them; and the colleagues have noted them.’